What a morning! First, the good news. The fluid in the baby's brain measured exactly as it should! Hooray! The doctor said that he felt that what he was looking at was a perfectly normal fetal brain. He wants to look again, just to be doubly sure that it's not something that is coming and going since we have had one normal scan and one abnormal one. He seemed very positive though.

But you know we don't get off that easily around here, right? My amniotic fluid was a little low, probably due to the stress of well... just life, I guess. I wasn't consciously stressed about the baby, but I'll admit that life has been extremely hectic and fast paced lately. 2 kids, working full time, blah blah blah. Anyway, he put me on bed rest for a week. I'll go back next week and they'll remeasure the amniotic fluid and also look at the brain again to make sure we're still all clear there. If my amniotic fluid is back to normal, I'll be released to go back to work (maybe just part time?). If there is fluid in the baby's brain again, then we'll do an MRI to see just what's going on.

So, GREAT news, with a little inconvenient news as well. My mother-in-law is coming tomorrow, then my mom is coming Monday, to help with the kids. Thank goodness for them. I am really grateful for their willingness to help, though I hate to have to do it. But, hopefully being off my feet will take care of this little problem, and it will be a temporary thing.

Well, that's it for now. Thank you so much for all the prayers and love that you guys have sent our way over the last two weeks. God is good, to have blessed us with positive news and wonderful friends like you.

PS- We saw the baby looking at us during the ultrasound. It was crazy! The eyes were closed, then the baby blinked at us and looked all around. Strange, but cute, in an alienish sort of way.

Okay... back to bed now. Doctor's orders and all...

I have recently learned the joys of owning a cellphone. (I know, you don't even have to say it.) Anyway, I'm on my way to work today and I gave my mom a quick call. As we're chatting, a bird hit my windshield and there were feathers and blood and I yelped. It wasn't my fault, but I still felt bad as I turned on the wipers. (wah.) I told my mom what happened, and her response was, "Aw, it was probably a little baby bird that fell out of it's nest."

Thanks, Mom. That's helpful. I was kind of hoping it was a cranky old coot that had lived a full life and simply keeled over of old age, in midflight, and landed on my windshield.

But your version is much more comforting.

(I'm just messing with you, Mom.)

Describe her? I... could try, I guess. I don't know if you'll understand though.

She's the gust of wind that rushes through the open window, and blows the papers around the room. Do you know what I mean? That chaotic force, unexpected and disruptive, but exactly what you need at that moment? She sends you scurrying after the pieces of your life that are caught up in the breeze. She brings disorder at precisely the right moment.

She doesn't live by the rules. It doesn't necessarily seem fair, because the rest of us have to live by rules, don't we? I mean... that's how things get done right? But she doesn't-- she floats, she sails, she rides... and watching her is inspirational. It's impossible not to feel that twinge of envy, like watching a bird stretching far beyond our imagination. But, it's not an ugly jealousy. It doesn't eat at you. It feeds you, pushes you, questions you. It makes you look down at your own arms, and wonder if there could be wings there instead.

She sees things that other people don't. She finds the true nature of a thing, and she exposes it with a color, with a photo, with a word. She isn't afraid. She takes chances. She doesn't let fear, of failure or humiliation, or rejection, stop her. Because that's her true nature. What could be cliche, a long solitary walk in the woods contemplating the world-- isn't. Because that's what is really inside her. Her ease with herself is the most natural thing, it's something she was born with. A gift she isn't even aware she has.

Oh, she's not perfect. It's all too easy to see that she is moody and overly dramatic and takes herself far too seriously. But being around her makes you smile indulgently at those things. It makes you love her even more.

There are plenty of people in the world like me. I know this. It's not an entirely comfortable thing to admit to myself, but I can be honest about it. There are only a few people like her though. The rest of us gravitate towards people like her. We want our lives to intercept, at least occasionally, with these brighter planes. Maybe not too much, because it makes us feel inadequate in some ways... but just enough to revive us. Remind us, that life is more than what is beneath our feet. It is also what is above our heads, out there, soaring around in heights that make us dizzy and giddy and laughy...

I count that view a blessing. And I count this soul my friend.

Well, I don't think I'm sick. A good night's rest cleared my head a little, and I feel better today. I think I'm just run down at the moment. So, I'll beef up on vitamin C, and try to take things easy for a few days. My ultrasound is coming up on Thursday, and I think that could be part of the problem. Trying not to stress out can be quite exhausting in itself! Anyway, I'll write more later, but I wanted to let you all know I didn't keel over last night, despite my dramatics.

Hey, I see you there in the back rolling your eyes. That's not nice.

Oh dear. I'm sadly lacking the "umpf" I need to face the week. I am usually recharged and ready to go on Mondays, but not today. Nosirree. I barely dragged myself in the office, and I must look how I feel because people keep asking me, "Oh girl, what is wrong with you today? You're not drinking again, are you?"

No, I'm not. Actually, I never was a drinker, - well I mean, that kind of drinker- but I'm giving off some serious hangover vibes today. And not the cute ouchie kind of hangover that Bridget Jones has. I'm talking full blown, crankylikeafifteenyearoldboy-Ihatethelight-jackhammerinmybrain-don'tmakemecutyou kind of hangover. Which goes well with the seven month pregnant belly, lemme tell you. People are taking the long way around me, at least those with a healthy instinct for self preservation. But I've not lost all sense of humanity. I've at least begun to compile a mental list of people to apologize to later once I get my head on straight again.

Oh sheesh. I'm probably getting sick, aren't I? How dumb am I that that is just occurring to me?

*sniff*
I wanna go home.

Making the most of my child-free morning, I hit Target hard and heavy today. I forgot how much fun shopping can be, when you don't have to referee the four and under set. My exercusions into consumerland with the kids are highly coordinated missions-- get in, get out, with as few casualties as possible. I think even Sydney Bristow would be impressed, especially since I try to vary different colored wigs each time. I take these covert operations very seriously.

But today was different, since I was off-duty mom. Today I coasted the aisles like a luxury ocean liner. I made tourist stops whenever and wherever. I nibbled on a few pieces of deli meat and didn't have to share with anybody. I didn't have to gallop wildly down the aisles to reach the nearest restroom because of a "potty emergency". I even got a Chinese couple to take my picture as I tried on multiple pairs of shoes.

Heavenly. I can't recommend this little getaway enough.

I wasn't under cover today, but I'll admit I did still wear a hot pink wig. But really only because it looked so good with the beret. Hey, a girl has to have a few quirks.

Wow, I am just worn slap-out. Not only is my department head on vacation, causing me to do my job AND hers, I am also training an orientee. My brain is FULL.

*yawn*

And unfortunately, there's not much time for blogging this week. Boo, as in Hiss. I don't like not being able to write. I've got quite a few things stirring around in my head, and hopefully when I come back from our Easter festivities, I'll be able to flesh those out a little. I haven't done much good writing lately, but it's mostly because of time issues. I've got some things brewing, as soon as I have time to write it all out.

Anyway, speaking of Easter festivities, guess who'll be neck deep in crawfish this coming Saturday? That would be me. Yummy. I'm taking my handy dandy new camera, and if I don't get crawfish juice (ew) on it, hopefully I'll get some good pictures of the boil and the easter egg hunt, too.

It's a good season to live in the South, folks. Crawfish this month, strawberries the next, tomatoes in a few months... purple hulled peas, corn on the cob....

Oh yeah. Sweet.

Okay, so I'm a nerd, with a disturbing affinity for corny puns.

As I suspected, I do not have gestational diabetes. I will take this as an omen to eat as much candy and carbs as I want. Huzzah!! I will commence celebration with Reese's Peanut Butter Eggs, truly one of the finest elements of Easter cuisine.

I'm only doing it because the baby told me to, though.

I plan on sitting down and doing some good, quality blogging tonight, but I wanted to post this quick note in the meantime, for those of you wondering how that turned out.

Happy Friday everybody! Enjoy your weekend. May it be full of chocolatey peanutbuttery goodness.

Today I had the glucose test, but I won't get the results until tomorrow morning. It was pretty brutal. No eating/drinking after midnight last night, then I had to drink this nasty stuff at 8:30 this morning. I got stuck four times, once every hour, and that's not counting the prick I already got from the first test day before yesterday. And no food in between.

When it was all over, I bore a striking resemblence to Courtney Love, complete with needle tracks and the shakes. Zing! That was so wrong.

Anyway, I was starving when it was all over, so I hightailed it to Raising Cane's Chicken Fingers, and ate like only a pregnant woman can. They have this special sauce, that's so incredibly special it makes me cry. I could drink the stuff. Okay. I did drink the stuff. Sue me. And they have crushed ice in their drinks, which sends me into happy little seizures. It was sooo good. I hear they are franchising in other places in La, so if you ever see one, for pete's sake, GO. After eating, I felt like... hmm... what's the opposite of Courtney Love? Hillary Duff? Whatever- it was a beautiful meal.

So, I'm doing good. I feel better today, things are back in perspective, optimism firmly in place. So many people have told me that they've had scares from ultrasounds and it was a false alarm, so I'm keeping that in mind.

OOOOHH, and I got a raise today!! I had my yearly evaluation and looks like all that kissing up has really paid off. Hah! No, I earned it, I promise. If you need proof, I direct you here. It was nice to have some good news though. In celebration of "mo' money", I bought a purse, a lovely little pink number that guarantees long life, prosperity, and happiness. Yeah, I thought that was a weird guarantee too, but hey, you never know. So like any good consumer... I bought.

Well, that covers today. You are now officially Shannon-current. Don't you feel special?

I should have known it would turn out this way when I learned the physician's name was Dr. Vague. No, I'm kidding, that wasn't his name, but he should look into having it changed. I suppose it's not his fault, but this was a very unsatisfying visit. I was hoping he'd say, "Your ob made a mistake and there's absolutely no reason to be concerned." But he didn't.

What he did say was, yes, there is a higher than normal level of fluid in the brain. It's not a lot, but we need to monitor it. Come back in two weeks, and we'll see if it's increased. He said some more technical stuff, too-- but I won't bog you down with the details. If you want them, write/call me and I'll share.

I know all the possibilities-- the best being that it will simply reabsorb and have no affect on the baby whatsoever. The worst, it increases and things get bad from there. I stay away from that line of thinking though. Everytime my thoughts head in that direction, I get all weepy and I can't survive the next two weeks like that.

The doctor wasn't willing to say everything was okay, but he did say he didn't think it was the worst case. But the truth is, it's not really in his hands, and I know that. God will do as He sees fit, and I trust that He knows better than me. Our lives are fragile threads maintained by His loving care-- but what better Hands to tend us? It doesn't mean that I am not sad or scared or weak... but it does mean that I am not alone, I am not forgotten, and I am not hopeless, not ever.

Anyway, thank you for your words of encouragement, and the prayers I know you were all saying today. I really appreciate that. Keep this little one in your thoughts in the next two weeks, that all the fears will be unfounded, and the worry that seeks entrance into our lives will find no hold. I am optimistic, despite the blue tone of this post. I think the odds are really good that this will resolve itself-- and that is how I will continue to think until I am told otherwise.

And that is that. I'll be tucking this away now, because life demands it of me. This is a nonstop ride we're on around here, and maybe that's not such a bad thing at the moment. Busyness has it's perks.

That's all for now. Dinner is ready, and I must feed the masses, else there will be mutiny...

This morning can be summed up in one word - "ugh". The cyst hasn't disappeared, but it hasn't grown either. It isn't interfering with the function of the bladder, so that's good. It's something we'll probably have to deal with when the baby is born, because it doesn't look like it's budging. At the most severe it would mean surgery, at the least it will mean monitoring for a while, and handling things like bladder infections and the like.

That's the good news (okay, well, it's not what I wanted to hear, but it's not horrible, at least.)

But, since it's the Ides of March, you can't get away without a little bad news. While they were doing the scan, they noticed that there seemed to be extra fluid in the brain (go figure, Annie.) Not much, but enough to warrant a closer look. So, tomorrow, I have an appointment with a specialist to determine if it is an issue or not. The doctor was optimistic, or he didn't want to alarm me, I couldn't really tell. He said he didn't think it was the worst case scenario, which is hydrocephalus, but he wanted to be sure. He didn't see other indications of that. I handled it pretty well in the doctor's office, but when I got home and looked it up... well, that was a mistake. Dang that information highway. Then I had to call my mother and mother-in-law with news of the visit, and I lost it a little. I'm sure I scared the lights out of them, but I'm okay now. I KNOW there's nothing that I can do, and I am trying to keep a cool head about it. I'm not the type to dwell on the worst that can happen, so I'll hang in there till tomorrow. My appointment is at 3.

Now, on top of all that, I got a call a little while ago from the lab that my glucose test showed high sugar. Oy. It was BARELY over the limit, and now I have to do the 3 hour fasting test, where they take your blood every hour and you can't eat, and blah blah blah. It's not a fun test to take, and I know it's going to make me sick and it'll come back just fine. I really doubt that I have gestational diabetes. I don't fit the profile at all, but hey, with the luck I'm having... who knows.

AND it's raining.

So, that's the post for the day, and now I need some high quality chocolate. America's Finest would hit the spot right now, but M&M's will do in a pinch.

Anyway, thanks for the thoughts and prayers this morning, you guys are just great! I'll be back on tomorrow evening with the results of this next scan. At least I'll get to see this baby up close and personal-- those high level ultrasounds are too cool! I'll post a picture if I can.

Till tomorrow.

My husband is not a fan of LoTR. He kept this well concealed until somewhere in our fifth year of marriage, at which point I figured an annullment was probably out of the question. And since I'm not Catholic or in a soap opera, I don't think I'm even allowed to do that.

Anyway. He lucked out.

I dragged him to the first LoTR, and had to elbow him awake a few times, much to my dismay. I didn't bother taking him with me to see the second one, and the marathon would have probably killed him for good--- so he never saw them. Until a few weeks ago, when I finally managed to rent the last two and I hogtied him. And gagged him. And reminded him how much child support would run if he didn't do this for me.

A good seven hours later, we were both thoroughly saturated in dramatic, theatrical dialogue and landscape. We were taking an intermission, and I stretched my back, trying to get the "pregnancy kinks" out. Patrick put his hand on my belly and asked, "So, how's the kiddo doing?", to which I replied, "Oh, it's fine. Kind of quiet tonight, though.".

And Patrick, with all the seriousness of Gandalf the White Wizard, proclaimed in his most dramatic voice, "His time has not yet come."

Smarty pants.

But, his time IS coming soon. I am 29 weeks. I figure I won't make it till 40 weeks, being the 3rd baby and with me working full time. So, ten weeks or less, and this little one will be here! I'm excited. I'm not impatient, but I am looking forward to meeting this little squirmy one. I'm to the point where I am starting to get a bit uncomfortable, but I'm not miserable yet. I've got a few more weeks in me before I really start to turn on the whine. Oh, and I see you rolling your eyes back there, Patrick. Careful now.

Anywho, all this to say, tomorrow I have an ultrasound. I had a routine ultrasound three weeks ago, and they found a uterocele (a cyst) on the baby's bladder. The doctor told me not to freak out, that these things often disappear. He said it didn't seem to be interfering with the functioning of the bladder/kidneys, and that was good. We would re-evaluate it in three weeks, and take it from there. Well, that's tomorrow.

I've done a very good job of taking his advice on not freaking out, and I've kept it in perspective for three whole weeks. But now, on the eve of the next ultrasound, I'll admit I'm fighting nervousness. I think it will turn out okay, I really do, but I would appreciate your thoughts tomorrow around 9ish. Send some good mojo my way, and I'll post an update when I get back.

Wish us luck!

We will not miss it this year. I've written it on my calender, in ink mind you, and fun WILL BE HAD on April 9th. Anybody wanna make the drive and hang out with us? I'll be the one with the strawberry stains on my big, happy belly.

Yay.

It comes to my attention that I may need to expand my horizon when the most exciting phone call I make is "GUESS WHO PEE-PEE'D IN THE POTTY!!!!!"

After 4 YEARS worth of wiping butts, that is pretty dang exciting though.

If I'm lucky, I'll have a whole two month's break from the dirty deed, during which I will attempt to develop more interesting phone skills.

You may applaud me now.

The very first one.

It only took me one week to figure out how to take, download, and edit it. Super.

Hey, did anybody catch Michael Buble performing on The Tonight Show last night? Who the heck is that guy? He was kickin!

I was cleaning out my purse, which had fallen into a shameful condition, when I found a brochure stuffed deep inside. It was titled, "How To Tell If Your Memory Loss Is Serious."

And I... uh... don't remember putting it there at all.

You know, I'm starting to wonder if the warm weather is bringing out the crazy people. There have been a rash of strange visitors to my work lately-- the guy with the lady's slippers, the old preacher who played his harmonica with his nose while clacking his dentures (did I mention him?), and that lady with the toilet paper doorag around her head...

Well, today this girl in maybe her early 20's came up to my desk looking for her sister. I entered the name in the computer to find out what room she was in, and while I was doing that, this girl started dancing. I mean, like really dancing. Booty shaking, club hopping, ghettolicious, to absolutely no music at all. I can only conclude that she did this for my own personal entertainment. Somehow, somehow, I did not fall out laughing. But I wanted to... oh so bad.

I love the crazy folk. And apparently, they like me, too.

Which is actually kind of scary, come to think of it.

Hello Monday. How the heck did you get here so fast? Seriously. This keeps happening, and I'm starting to get suspicious.

Our weekend was lowkey. And if you think I'm complaining, you're wrong. Lowkey is a good thing now-- wait a minute while I just settle here in my rocker and I'll tell you all about it. I was off Friday, as aforementioned (*putting away the Webster's now), so I had to work on Saturday. It was my last weekend to work; from now on, I will work M-F. (*happy little dance.) Sunday, we had church and potluck dinner afterwards. I was nice enough to leave some food for everybody else, but it was a struggle. I had to stop and pray a little bit, especially over the dessert area. Anyway, after all that eatin', who could blame me for indulging in a Sunday Afternoon Nap? Go on. I dare you. Blame the pregnant lady. You monster.

Anyway, it was lovely.

Today, I got the house picked up, laundry started, and icetrays filled. I am on a roll, people! I even dusted and opened the windows to let the breeze blow through the house. I rock. It's amazing how motivated I feel with Enya playing in the background, scented candles burning, and rain pattering gently outside. Oh, and the smell of Murphy's Oilsoap. I do love me some furniture polish.

I'm kidding. Sort of. Okay, not at all. I love the stuff.

So, it was a productive day. And full of such compelling blog material, too, wasn't it? Most of the time, I don't write about the day to day happenings here at APOG. Mainly because that stuff can be bo-RING! But, I've been thinking lately about why I read the blogs I read. I've got a few that I feel comfortable checking once a week, or every few weeks-- because the authors don't write often or seriously. Then, there are a few that I read religiously every day. Why? Well, I just have to know the ending of the story. How did that job interview/audition go? How is their pregnancy progressing? How did their haircut turn out? Was the yellow paint the right choice for the bedroom? And then the more serious, longterm aspects of life, like how are they dealing with the death of their mother? Will they mend that broken friendship? How are they coping with new motherhood? Will they get out of debt?

Basically, I'm a very nosy person. No... that's not it, not entirely. It's that as a reader, I'm invested in them, I'm rooting for them, I want the story to have a happy ending. It's the little details, the pictures of their kitchen, their baby, their favorite coffee mug-- that make them real. The mundane, the trivial, those things make them normal, like me. (okay, so that's debatable.) Anyway, if knowing what I ate for breakfast (pancakes) makes me seem a little more real to my own readers, then I'm all for it. It doesn't mean I'll stop blogging about the Big Stuff, or dabbling in short stories and fiction, but it means that I'll give you a little more of myself than before. This was one of the reasons I was so excited about the digital camera. (I'm still going through the manuel, by the way. Patience, friends.)

Maybe it's slightly narcissistic (*okay, I got out the Webster's again) to think that anyone would be interested in those things. I dunno. But I find myself drawn to the blogs that include those things, so maybe there's something to it.

Hm. Sounds like I just wrote an essay on why you can expect some boring stuff at APOG now. Goodie.

Okay, that's enough out of me. I've got work to do, folks. Back to your stations.

Wrenn told me today, quite seriously, that my belly button looks "mad". I have to admit I immedietely went to the mirror to see if she was right. I mean, that's not the kind of thing you can ignore, when body parts get angry with you. You have to address these issues head on. Don't want a mutiny on your hands... or feet... or whatever.

Anyway, turns out she was right. My belly button definitely looks a little "put out".

HAHAHAHA!

Well, maybe you had to be there.

Shut up.

It's... breathtaking.

The Canon Powershot A95.

We're going to be very happy together, I can tell.

I'm off tomorrow. I'm so happy, I wish I knew how to breakdance.

unnnst unnnst unnnst... (that's club music, by the way, in case you were wondering.)

I'd be all over the place, hopefully in blacklight. That would be so awesome.

Anyway, Wrenn has school, so there won't be any lazing about in bed, but that's okay. I love to wake her up for school. I go in, and just look at her for a few minutes. Her skin is so peachy and bright and soft. I push the curls back, and stroke her head for a few minutes. Her lashes flutter open, and the first motion of her day is to smile at me. Such a sweet, happy, lazy grin. If I have a few extra minutes, I'll crawl into bed with her, and just snuggle for those quiet minutes, before the ticking of the clock matters.

Am I lucky or what? It's so great to be a mom, it really is. It's the funnest, most special thing I've ever done. Every day (even the crazy, wannapullmyhairout kind) contains some moment that makes me thank God for these two, no- three, little people who inhabit my world.

Anyway, this was just supposed to be a synopsis of what my schedule is for tomorrow, not an ode to motherhood. I have a hard time not scratching behind the ear of my poetic puppy though.

That analogy... was sort of odd.

ANYWAY--- Focus please--- after I take Wrenn to school, Eli and I will come back to do a little housework. (mmm-- I can hardly wait.) At precisely 9:45, we will walk out the door to our glorious destination: CompUSA. To purchase The Camera.

The rest of the day has been slotted for extreme picture taking. So, be ready for Monday. I may crash your computer trying to load APOG.

Whoa-- I nearly blacked out from giddiness again. This is going to be so much fun.

In an effort to dramatically reduce the whining that goes on around my house, I've decided to treat myself to a digital camera. (Ha, you thought I was talking about the kids, huh?) I'm trying to decide what kind I need and soon, dear readers, "You Shall See What I See!!" she says dramatically.

Like the guy wearing the gorgeous lady's slippers who keeps walking past my desk. I'm fairly certain I could get a good shot of that without him noticing. And even if he did, come on. He's just asking for it.

Anyway, YIPPEE!

"No, I'm sorry sweetie, we'll play later... Mommie has to get ready for work."

I think the frowny face is highly appropriate at the moment.

:(